My Father's Hair...

So the Natural Hair movement has taken the world by storm in the past few years, and me the low maintenance person I am who had damaged their long relaxed hair by keeping it in one virtually all the time out of laziness and 'cant botheration' not only jumped on the band wagon, but begun to drive it.

Taking better care of my hair and spending time with it, I begun to appreciate myself even more as a result. Switching from sulphate shampoos and silcone conditioners, being cognitive of the fact that what I was putting on my hair was able to seep into my scalp and thus my bloodstream, became a conscious  thought. I started reading labels more and tried more natural hair and skin products. I did a lot of research and started feeling excited about the journey I was on, reconnecting me to my roots - literally! For me, the Natural Hair Movement is not political or social, rather it has become a very personal journey. As I explored different options to improve the health of my hair and skin, I begun to eat better and now after 2 years of being a non-smoker (yes yes I appreciate the applause) I figure, if I can quit smoking I can do anything :). So with that said I decided to do the Big Chop even though I planned to transition for 8 months, I called my hair dresser and told her I was ready 3 months in.


My Big Chop experience was not the liberating experience that most women describe. Between a few yells of "Oh my......" followed by a few expletives, mixed in with hysterical laughter as a friend of mine instructed my hair stylist to cut down the middle of my head so I had no choice but to sit there rather than go to work the next day looking like bozo the clown.

I had big chopped twice before years ago, but never like this, it was due to a break up (ya that psychological practice deserves a blog/article all on it's own). Those times however the natural strands didn't last too long, whether by Curl Activators or Texturisers, I immediately had to tame my hair. This time it was all for me, not emotionally driven, or the need to 'let go and grow' as it were.

So as more of my tresses fell to the floor and my scalp grew colder I raised a hand to touch my hair and in that moment my heart stood still. You see, I had lost my father in Nov. 2011, and as my fingers touched my hair, for what felt like the first time, I was immediately carried to a memory. I held back the tears and begun to smile and laugh a bit. In that very moment, I was now 4 years old again touching my Father's hair and placing clips in his hair. I remember he had just come from work, sat on the edge of his bed and it was passed my bed time, I was already 'pretending to sleep' and as I heard the springs in his bed sink, I jumped up, grabbed my clips and stood behind him to play in his hair.

Thanks to my mom, I have this memory forever also as a photograph. So as I sat there in my hairstylist's chair, smiling to myself, something dawned on me..... something so beautiful and simple.... I realized I have my Father's hair, and there is nothing I would ever do to change that again.


I love you Daddy!

Celebrating & Honouring the Yuletide

Yule is a seasonal celebration, which precedes the origination of Christmas and the Christianization of the earlier civilizations in Europe. Yule was usually observed by taking a tree into the home (Sound familiar?), of which, the family would cut the largest portion of its trunk to be burned little by little in the fireplace during the early winter, while the rest of the tree would remain in the home as a sign of the spring to come. If any of the cut log was left after the winter solstice celebration, it would be preserved and kept in the home for the year and used to light the subsequent log in the coming winter.

Yule marks a reflective time for one to assess the past and what they wish to manifest in the future, hence the symbolic burning of a living tree, to create heat for survival during one of the harshest months of the year. This is the darkest time of the year, when one looks inward and allows them-self to let go of things no longer needed to make room for what is to come, to burn what must be forgotten for the greater good.

This particular Yule time, will also mark the end of a 26,000 year cycle of our planet, with the alignment of our solar system with the very centre of our galaxy. Regardless of what one believes, this is indeed a time to acknowledge what we wish to manifest for our futures as individuals and as humanity as a whole.

What are the things you need to allow yourself to let go of?

What are the things you wish to manifest?

What aspects of you need healing?

Who do you need to send healing to?

As we get into the full swing of Yule, our minds tend to naturally wonder to the things we should have done and things we should NOT have done - we will do one of two things. We either force away the thoughts or we dwell on them. However, neither works to the betterment of self.

 Instead, try to acknowledge them and have the courage to HONOUR them. Ask yourself why you made that decision or why you didn’t, but most importantly be honest with yourself in the process.

One of the most difficult quests I believe anyone has to face, is to have the courage to be honest with oneself. It requires guts to acknowledge the hurt that you have experienced, but more importantly the hurt you have caused others and inflicted upon yourself.

It’s easy to blame others - to say well... "I had to, they gave me no choice" or "What did you expect me to do?" or "It’s not my fault" or..... I could go on forever.

The point is to assess the situation, person or time in your life in isolation - OBJECTIVELY. Look within and release the feelings of fear that led to you making those decisions. Ask yourself why you felt you deserved less or why you felt you deserved more than another person.

Guilting yourself into remorse is certainly not the objective - rather it is having the courage to face the truth of your actions. Once you are able to do that, then you can free yourself from guilt or the justification of your actions and then you can let go, and sometimes whether to yourself or others .......say sorry and be able to move on in TRUTH!

The celebration of Yule is both very emotional and liberating. To allow yourself to fully let go, enables you to be ready and open to receive in the future. It is time to free ourselves from the weight of our fears, insecurities and hurts. When you think about it....what’s the point of holding on to it anyway?! :)